MARRY A GIVER, NOT NECESSARILY A RICH SPOUSE.
Some years back, there was this high society family that I worked for. The man was a General in the Nigerian Army. The house was heavily guided by soldiers. Getting a pass was strictly by invitation.
I always envied the wife of the man because she lived in a big mansion all by herself (the husband was serving in another state) and she was always driven round town in expensive cars, accompanied by lots of bodyguards. The "Big madam" vibe was top notch.
There was a day I took some designer clothes and shoes to the woman to advertise to her.
Fortunately for me, she admitted that she liked them and would like to buy them.
I expected her to collect everything and pay immediately with something extra for the boys .
But she told me she would get back to me.
I felt like "Haba mummy, the cost of these items is just a drop in the ocean compared to the kind of wealth you're swimming in".
Everytime I went to work in their house, I kept on reminding the woman.
One day, she told me to sit down and she began to lament. She told me that things are not as they seem.
She said her husband didn't allow her to work and he does not usually give her money. She explained that the soldiers were the ones who used to buy whatever she needed at home, she would not even use her hands to touch the money. She said she didn't have up to 50k in her account. Even if she ask her husband, the man would not give her the money directly. She said the most annoying part was the fact that everyone is seeing her as a rich woman and no one would believe that she's a broke wife of a rich husband. She was almost crying while speaking.
Moral Lessons:
1. Dear young lady, before you marry any man, ask him if he wants a full time housewife (a wife that does not work), if he says yes, find out his reasons. If it is because of his insecurities, then you may be walking into a problem. Think again if you want to live the rest of your life with a man who wants to keep you hidden because he's scared of other men talking to you.
If he says it's because he has enough to fend for you, then you should convince him to establish you. He should establish business and buy properties in your name. You should be the sole owner of the businesses and properties. Not the one you people will have a small misunderstanding and he will strip you off everything he has given you.
2. Kindly note that you don't necessarily need a rich husband, there are stingy rich men. Such men around you will even block destiny helpers. There are broke wives of rich but stingy men. What you need is a man that can give.
3. You're not ready for marriage if you have no job, no skill, no means of livelihood. No matter what it is, have a source of income as a woman, even if it's something small. Don't be totally dependent on anyone. Men place value on women that can fend for themselves. It is not a taboo if a woman is wealthier than her husband oo. The only thing is that wealth should not push her to contend authority with her husband.
4. You may be better than the person you're envying. It is not all that glitters that is gold. The person wearing the shoe is the one that knows where it hurts.
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